We had a message on the answering machine the other day.  Someone we knew in college passed away.  He found out a month ago he had liver cancer.  He died Friday.  His wife writes a blog and in it she said that she didn't know how to pay the bills, because her husband did it.  She was going to stay in bed until they took his body away.  So sad :(  It is so blunt and in your face when you are faced with how short your life is.  You want to turn away from the reality of what if that were you and your family.

In my mind the things I think about dying are:

• what about my kids?  I want them to know how much I love them and will miss them.
• will my husband know how to make food or wash clothes?  I really hope so (I have been trying to teach the boys how to use the washer and dryer, so they can become independent :)
• make sure my husband knows my passwords and can pay bills and get into the safe deposit box
• i want my family to be happy